NO, I DON'T USE AN AGE MIRACLE CREAM

Dear Ageist 

Let me begin by telling you that yes I am 37 yrs old and very proud to be one.

I would like to point out on the outset that you are being extremely ageist and appear to be obsessed with looking "young". Your statement “You don’t look your age” certainly gives me that impression.  People who are of a certain age, 37 yrs in my case, can look anything from 37, 26 or even 50. There isn't a set yard-stick for measuring how a person should look outwardly at a particular age. How one looks or doesn’t depend to a great extent on conflation of several factors like genetic disposition, inclination towards a specific life style, medical and health conditions, motherhood ( for women) and of course the natural process of aging.

To put a high value on 'youth" and thereby making it sound as a compliment for a person who has no business looking  other than  what she is in terms of age, you are de-valuing the significance of growing old and the life experiences that are a  part of being a certain age (that is not considered "young" by you).  I would still be me if I looked any different. What defines me is my thought process and not my look. However I would not have the kind of experience in life if I were not 37 yrs old. Believe me I would not like to go a decade back and be 27 yrs old. Never! I am my happiest best at 37 and I would not like to do any sort of trade off which would enable me to travel back in time. What does not appear in the photos but is my new reality is the salt and pepper look. I am so in love with this look that I can’t wait the salt to pre-dominate the pepper. This ultra stylish look is all thanks to being 37 yrs old.

People are more than their chronology; they are individuals, a repository of immense knowledge and wisdom. However without chronology this wisdom may never would have been a part of a personal story. This wisdom comes with time and time comes with age. Hence to deny the pivotal role that age plays in shaping a person, you are not only negating the entire tryst with life of that person but  are also subscribing to the much debated yet aspired standard of “youth” that the society we live in propagates and promotes.  The pre-occupation with looking young is almost laughable in my view. Why would anyone want to live in the past and not experience the here and now in all its vitality? An innocuous looking hair colour to a  surgical correction of nose and  and daily dose of botox injections to make the wrinkles disappear are all full fledged frontal attack on our self esteem. All these products, the industry that manufactures them and the people who consume them (or aspire to consume them) form a part of a system that prioritizes youth over wisdom. A system that shouts out loud “You are not good enough being who you are”.  I refuse to cow down to a social norm that makes me question my very existence.

A last bit of unsolicited piece of my mind to the agesist in you. As my friend Christine so aptly puts "If I can live with my age and the salt in my hair, and you can't, then clearly, you do not need to be in my life and I am okay with that thank you very much

I hope by now you understand why your "compliment" was not taken as one.

Thanking you

Yours sincerely

A woman who does not use an anti-aging cream